Don't bring a chicken to a knife fight..

A MAN attending an illegal cockfight in California has died after being stabbed in the leg by a bird with a knife attached to its own limb.  35-year-old Jose Luis Ochoa was declared dead at a hospital about two hours after he suffered the injury in Tulare County, north of Los Angeles, on January 30.

Eye witnesses say that prior to the altercation, the victim was overheard makign rude comments pertaining to chicken breasts and thighs.  Police are investigatig, and have interviewed several chickens who were on the scene, however, so far they have refused to cooperate.  Police will keep two hens in custody until they have enough egg's to make souffle for the departments family picnic.

 

In other news.

 

TOY company Mattel is asking the public to vote on whether Barbie and Ken should be reunited after a seven-year split.  Barbie and Ken, two half-century-old dolls marketed by Mattel, split on Valentine's Day 2004 after 43 years together.  Barbie claimed that Ken was letting himself go, and Ken argued that Barbie was too old to be wearing skanky clothes, and frankly, she was just high maintenance.  "Have you seen her digs?  Her wardrobe?  Her campervan?  Who do you think has to pay for that?  And what do I get in return?  We havent had sex in.. like ever!". 

It is understood that reconciliation of the couple will rest on whether a prenuptual agreement can be reached.